Behind the phrase “Here we are a family!” there are pitfalls that can undermine the transparency of relationships, proactiveness for innovation and even people’s mental health. But hey, this is not a Machiavellian organizational strategy. It is a consequence of the structuring and formation of companies in the country.
According to data from Sebrae and IBGE, family businesses represent 90% of the businesses created, are responsible for 65% of GDP and generate approximately 75% of formal jobs in Brazil. WOW!
As we are not a country historically developed in terms of leadership and management, it is common to hear phrases that compare companies to families, as a reflection of the intention to seek a shortcut to the construction of bonds of a social group that acts with commitment and interests in common, guided by care, empathy, respect, and affection for each other. That is, it is an attempt to transfer noble values from the family structure to the organizational arrangement.
However, in a world with profound changes in social relationships, with the transformation of the meaning of work, the evolution of the leadership role and the reinvention of organizations, it is necessary to face the fact that a company is not a family. And most importantly, it’s not your family.
Each individual has a unique story and a unique perception of what their family experience is all about. There are families in which the concentration of power is absolute and unquestionable; there are others in which the role of provider is male, while the woman must resign herself to taking care of the house, children and husband; there are also those in which parents are lax and children need to become responsible for activities for which they are not prepared early on; and so many other formats and possible connections…
In other words, the comparison between business and family leads each person to a different understanding of what will be at stake in the professional relationship, and can trigger undesirable effects in the world of work – such as those listed below:
1. Lack of limits on WHAT can be requested and HOW can be requested
Imagine a relationship-heavy family structure, where relationships were built on fear and punishment. The legitimate one “sends who can and obeys who has sense”. The association of this bond format can be extremely negative for people, leading them to position themselves in a submissive way, paving the way for cases of moral harassment, abuse of power, overwork and burnout.
2. Confusion between respect and omission
The familiar metaphor suggests a dear and respected leader who is always doing his best and to whom we must be completely grateful. For fear of causing hurt or seeming ungrateful, people fail to point out flaws in the processes and indicate opportunities for improvement, because in the family structure there is no feedback conversation with father and mother, right? With silence in the name of obedience, say goodbye to innovation and diversity of thought…
3. The weight of the emotional bond
“If we’re a family, you’ve got to love us” – and thus a great deal of confusion is created about the place formal work occupies in an individual’s life.
Not every person is willing to share details of their intimacy, participate in integration actions outside of work, or celebrate milestones and accomplishments with the group.
Not everyone is comfortable with a closer, more personal interaction. (By the way, a few weeks ago, a man won a compensation of around 2 million reais for having received a surprise birthday party, even after expressly explaining his discomfort and trigger for anxiety attacks).
Many families invade this individual space, and taking this imposition to the professional world is even more painful, because there is a suggestion that the “bond that unites us is greater than a contract and has no end…”. Well, then when a person makes a particular decision about changing careers or receives an offer to earn twice as much, or even falls in love and wants to live in another country, etc. there is a feeling of betrayal rather than happiness at your achievement.
4. Exaggerated loyalty
According to organizational consultant Joshua A. Luna, studies indicate that people who are overly loyal to the “family-company” are more likely to engage in unethical acts to keep their jobs and also tend not to point out the misconduct of others. collaborators.
I myself have worked in an organization where people were so loyal that many were aware of illegal practices by a director, but remained silent because the act brought financial gains to the company. When the case came to light, faced with a huge institutional risk, it was surprising to identify that the link with the organization had become superior to the ethical sense.
5. Infantilization of the team and need for attention
Generally, in a family, brothers and sisters vie for the attention of fathers and mothers; they make unreasonable comparisons about what one and the other deserve; they ignore the relationship of effort and positive discipline that generates differentiated recognition; they feel wronged; and they place themselves as passive agents in the shared care commitments of the family unit. That is, they tend to act only when they receive orders and pressure. (This concept is explained in detail in a previous article in this column: “Without protagonism, you get nowhere”.)
You can imagine the level of dependence and infantilization that comes with these behaviors in the professional environment, right?
6. Overload for leadership
By positioning people as characters with less power and low level of autonomy, leadership is burdened by the excess of decisions and the responsibility for the success of workers.
In a kind of overprotection, leadership believes that people’s careers and performance depend deeply on their actions and end up having difficulty delegating decisions and helping employees in the self-development process.
Overworked leadership and childish teams are a dangerous combination.
And now, fam… I mean, folks?
Does this all mean that a company that calls itself a family is a bad place to work? Not. Does not mean. There are serious organizations that take good care of their teams, that see themselves as families, with the good intention of creating positive bonds. However, it is time to mature and recognize the side effects of this practice, and the risk it poses to the success of the organization and to the health and individuality of workers.
To promote a healthy culture, organizations must align performance expectations, explain the company’s purpose, define limits of access and responsibility, discuss ethical boundaries, and recognize the temporary and professional nature of the relationship.
Even if a company is not a family, we can become an adult, mature community with shared values, aware of our commitments and that has a high level of awareness of our co-responsibility in the quality of relationships, always with respect, empathy, focus, discipline, commitment and, lo and behold, there’s even room for friendship and love – but that last one is a topic for a future article ;^)
What’s up? Were you already aware of the effects of mixing the concept of business with family?
How is this issue at your job?
Leave your comment here or write me on instagram @pellaes – I want to know what your perception is on this topic.
A big hug and very good work.
Amazing Places to Work
The Incredible Places to Work Award is an initiative by UOL and FIA to recognize companies that have the best practices in people management. The winners are defined based on the results of the FIA Employee Experience (FEEx) survey, which measures the quality of the work environment, the strength of the organizational culture, the leadership’s performance style and satisfaction with HR services. The survey is already in the phase of collecting data from the registered companies and the winning companies should be announced in August.
